There are few people who take body shaming as boss-like as Kelly Clarkson. In response to an Independence Day tweet in July, a user commented, “You’re fat”. Clarkson’s response: “….and still fucking awesome”.
But just because the global superstar and winner of the first-ever season of “American Idol” can handle haters like a pro today, that doesn’t mean she has always been immune to negative energy surrounding body image. In fact, she recently recalled a particularly difficult time in her life, when she was both her skinniest self and yet her most miserable self.
Body image is something all women toil with at one point or another, and Clarkson is never one to shy away from the topic. In an interview with Attitude, Clarkson revealed, “When I was really skinny, I wanted to kill myself. I was miserable, like inside and out, for four years of my life. But no one cared, because aesthetically you make sense.” She added, “It was a very dark time for me.”
Her comments are reminiscent of Ke$ha’s most recent revelations to Rolling Stone magazine about when she was in the depths of an eating disorder. She said, “I was slowly, slowly starving myself. And the worse I got and the sicker I got, the better a lot of people around me were saying that I looked. They would just be like, ‘Oh, my gosh, keep doing whatever you’re doing! You look so beautiful, so stunning.'”
Like Ke$ha’s, Clarkson’s weight loss went hand-in-hand with her depression. Even while she turned to weight loss to cope with being “around some really negative people”, it wasn’t until she broke free from her record label and reclaimed creative control of her music when she began to heal and feel beautiful in her own skin.
After the interview was published, Clarkson took to Twitter to clarify her comments. She wrote: “Just to clear something up. I wasn’t ever miserable because I had to be thin. I said I was miserable and as a result I became thin.” She added, “I’ve never contemplated suicide because of my weight. I said people had no idea I was unhappy, oddly enough because I appeared healthy.”