confidence

Have you ever looked around and wondered where your inspiration and self confidence went? Have you wanted to hear, “You can do it!” – but the only sound was an echo? Have you looked for support and found only a dog staring back up at you, listening intently but unable to utter the words you desperately need to hear?

It’s time to get over it. It’s time to become your biggest cheerleader.

We all wish that we had a stable support group of friends and family who cheered us on in life. A team that we could rely on through thick and thin, that would bulwark our efforts towards greatness and hold us up when the going gets tough. But an unwavering community of solid support only happens in Hollywood – and in group therapy. Each of us must become our biggest cheerleaders, and create a fountain of self confidence, support, enthusiasm and inspiration that flows from within. Here’s how:

1. Every morning before you get out of bed, think of ten things that are great about yourself. If this idea makes you uncomfortable, then you probably have low self-esteem – and you probably need a cheerleader more than ever! Start now: count ten reasons you are amazing, from your thoughtful nature to your excellent apple slicing skills to your beautiful toes. Repeat every single morning.

2. Still in bed? Visualize a team of cheerleaders cheering you on: “GO [Your Name Here] GO! You can do it! You are BOLD! You are BEAUTIFUL!” Don’t worry about being silly – it’s all in your head! Develop a personal cheer that fits your needs – and gives you strength to face your day. Repeat this cheer enough, and it will pop into your head during the day whenever you get frustrated with life.

3. Have a talk with your past and future selves. Imagine yourself in a dome, surrounded by epic nature: waterfalls, a forest, desert landscape, whatever suits your fancy. Now imagine that your future self enters and sits down for a talk. Maybe she is 60, maybe she is 90 – but she’s got some excellent advice. She loves you, and thinks that you’re pretty incredible. What exactly does she say? Put yourself in the shoes of your future self and talk to your current self. You can also talk to your past self. Imagine yourself as a child of seven or eight. Sit with her in the dome. What would you tell this child? Probably not that her thighs are too fat. Talk to her with love and let her know how wonderful she is.

4. Learn to pay attention to criticism, mark it as such and dismiss it almost all of the time. Whether it’s your mother, your boss or your best friend, many of us have a relationship that hinges on being critical – or “help,” as they see it. If you don’t recognize the incoming criticism as such, you’re in danger of understanding it as… gulp… reality. It’s not. You’re a pretty awesome human being. You try hard. You are kind. Let the critical person say their piece – recognize it as BS – and nod with a smile and then go about your life. Do not, for any reason, allow the ongoing criticism to affect your self-esteem. Learn to recognize it so that you can throw it in the trashcan.

There is only one person that you can 100 percent rely on for emotional support – good thing that she’s a bad ass. It’s time to step up and become your biggest cheerleader! Go team go!

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