3 Ways to Stop Negative Self-Talk and Love You

Jar of happy thoughts.

I am 31 years old and still awash in insecurity. Who isn’t, really? I’ve never known a single person – female or male – who doesn’t have a complaint about some aspect of their person. We all wish we could be “perfect,” even though “perfect” is like a mythical creature that lives in a world populated by unicorns and mermaids.

So, since perfection is a myth, let’s start to base thoughts about ourselves in reality. And those things you perceive as flaws? Nah, they are personal trademarks! Read on to discover 3 ways that you can stop the negative self-talk and start to love your flaws.

1. Dislike that personality trait? Embrace it and work with it

I enjoy being shy like I enjoy a splinter in the foot. But I am what I am! So, instead of loathing the fact that I am shy, I try to think of it as benefit – a personality perk, if you will. My shyness, along with my anxiety, and introversion, allows me to be incredibly observant. I am a great listener! And I am never bored. Seriously, hand me a book and a notepad, and I’m good. Any of your personally perceived less-than-awesome traits aren’t as bad as you think. Just look for the good in them!

2. Embrace how you look

I’ve got scars all over my legs. And before the scars, there was eczema, which was so bad, that I was dubbed “chicken pox lady” in grade school. It took me until I was 25 to not give a flying flip about those scars. Now, I view them as neat little features that have been with me my whole life! Throughout my life, I’ve also had other issues with my body and my looks (who hasn’t). Now, I’m not “totally cool” with my reflection, but at least I don’t have appearance anxiety anymore. I’m just happy that I’m alive and have a body that’s healthy.

3. Stop the negative self-talk

It’s easy to think you’re “gross” or “boring” if you keep hurling aspects you dislike about yourself in your head. Instead of thinking negative thoughts, think neutral, or positive thoughts. My go-to morning line is, “Say! You ain’t half bad!” I always envision some 1940s newsman saying that to me and in cracks me up. After a good laugh and a dose of reality, I’m ready for my day.

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“4 Things I (Used To) Hate About Myself,” XOVain

Image: MartaZ*