Are you asking yourself: Why am I so unhappy?
We all struggle with happiness. I’m not familiar with anybody who truly yearns to be unhappy. But true happiness comes with self knowledge. It’s about taking steps toward your own wellbeing. And valuing yourself enough to strive for happiness right now. Happiness has nothing to do with what you have or what you will have. Rather, it’s an internal state of being. If your goal is to find happiness in 2015, leave these unhappy habits in your dust.
1. Looking to others for fulfillment.
When I was getting my wedding dress tailored, the seamstress gave me some great advice. She said don’t look to your husband for happiness. It has to be found within yourself. And this is true of others in your life. You’re the only person that can provide sustaining happiness so stop depending on others to provide it for you.
2. Comparison thinking.
We have a rule in our house. Don’t ever compare yourself to others. You have no idea how other people feel or what’s going on in their heads. We all fight inner struggles even your most beautiful, serene, and wealthy friend. Part of finding happiness is avoiding comparing yourself to others and when those around you reach goals, be happy for them.
3. Living mindlessly.
Mindfulness, or the ability to live in the present moment is a key to happiness. Take some time whether through meditation, yoga, or getting outdoors to connect with yourself. Diving head deep into your smartphone, television, or social networking sites isn’t going to connect you with your inner bliss, that takes true solitude.
4. Not taking care of yourself.
This is your vessel so you’d better take care of it. You are your greatest gift so treat your mind, body, and spiritual self with respect. Eat right, get moving and find some time to do what you love in life.
5. You’ll be happy once you meet your goals.
Happiness can only be found in the present moment not once you buy a fancy home, car, or take that trip around the world. This is a form of putting off happiness. Learn to find pleasure in the present moment instead of depending on outside achievement or material things to reach it. Otherwise you’ll always be striving and you’ll never be actually living.
6. You’re judgmental.
Judging others may in some way make you feel better in the short run but after you’re done, you’re sure to feel lousy. There’s a level of guilt that comes with putting other people down and the only way to avoid it is by not going there.
7. You’re stuck in the past.
If you’re constantly dwelling on who wronged you in the past, you’re carrying a heavy load. Part of finding happiness is the ability to let go and to forgive those that hurt you. If you’re stuck in the past you could also be unable to forgive yourself for something you did to someone else. Let that go.
8. You’re in debt.
Debt subconsciously holds us back. It’s another weight that we have to carry. Pay off your debts and then be honest about what you have so you’re not constantly worrying about finances.
9. You need approval.
Don’t seek validation from those around you. Be your own judge of character. You don’t need someone else to tell you what you’re doing is worthwhile. Stop asking yourself why am I so unhappy and make some changes.
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Depressed woman photo from Shuttershock